Top Five: Why I Should or Should Not Work Customer Service

I have been trying to find work since I left my last employer, Xerox, in March 2011. I've already told my story about Xerox, and it seems to be my most popular blog. Since then I've put in application after application, and only received one interview, and I didn't get that job.

So I've been reviewing every aspect of my life lately to see why I'm not getting interviews for customer service positions, when I obviously have the experience.

Also I've been soul searching as to whether or not I really want to do customer service any more. I was reading the other day about SSDI and what would qualify me for benefits. They look beyond the injury to see if I can still do the kind of work I've been doing. The article also mentioned that the final result would not take into consideration how difficult it has been for me to find a job.

That got me thinking: Can I still do Customer Service? Could I ever do Customer Service? So without further ado, here are the

Top Five Reasons Why I Should Not Work Customer Service

5. It Makes Me Sick.

I've worked at call centers since 2001, longer if you count a brief strike at US West where I filled in for striking reps. At every stop along the road, I've had severe migraines. They don't start right away, these migraines are nefarious. I can make it through training, and a few weeks of steady call flow before they start to appear. When I started getting them, I thought they were sinus headaches and took all kinds of medicines to cure them. That didn't help.  So I went to a doctor, who told me they were indeed migraines and gave me medicine for them, that really didn't help much. The problem is not with my brain, it is with the stress that the job creates. If you doubt Customer Service is a stressful vocation, read this. 

Now, it is not the customer service aspect of the job that is stressful to me and causes the headaches. It is the phone contact. I had a wonderful job for my first 3 months working for Sento in Raleigh (now Total Outsourced Systems) where I participated in online chats with customers of Overstock.com. I literally had a dream job, where I could listen to music, 'chat' with customers over the internet in a text interface, and literally not have to talk. Then Christmas came around and everyone was put on the phones. The chat was outsourced to India. Funny, that. Overstock.com outsourced the customer service to Sento, then outsourced it again to India. Well how's that for irony?

But that wasn't the only position at Sento I had that I enjoyed. I worked for a time after Overstock for a rebate processor, first over the phones, then as a Mentor where I answered emails all day and took supervisor calls, which lessened my customer contact. But in that case, I had stress from a supervisor that didn't see eye to eye with me, increasing the stress and affecting my health, and I stopped being the mentor and went back on the phones.

Strangely enough, every job I've had since has been a phone job. Either I'm a glutton for punishment (which I am not) or the only work I could find was customer service, because that's where my experience came from. So despite the fact that it made me sick, I continued to work customer service.

4. I'm Not Enthusiastic. 

I ain't no freakin' cheerleader! ;-) I speak with a quiet, reasoned voice. Some people think I sound younger than I am. Good for them. I went to an interview back in May where the interviewer told me they were looking for enthusiasm.  I tried to play along, I couldn't force myself.

3. I Don't Like to Talk.

If you know me at all, you know I'm a very quiet person. I've been like that my whole life. I don't apologize for being that way. At several points in my life, I've considered shutting up altogether and going through life with a stack of cards that would read like this:

I do not talk.

I can speak, read and write.

I can hear and understand you just fine.

When I speak, it is with a soft voice. 

I am frequently drowned out by everyone else.

So I choose not to talk.

Please understand.

I've thought about making an app (there's an app for that) for those that choose not to speak. It would contain basic answers to frequently asked questions, menu choices from frequented restaurants, and perhaps vocalizations with a pleasant gender-appropriate voice. Or I could print out a stack of cards that will do the same thing. I'm tempted to make a video of me doing that, if I still had my camera and the resources to print the cards.

But in the world of Customer Service, you must talk. You must be enthusiastic (see 4). You must be friendly. I wouldn't say I'm the human equivalent to Grumpy Cat, but it's hard for me to be friendly when someone is calling me an idiot because I can't get his computer to work.

I stutter. It doesn't happen as often as it used to, but if I get rattled, it happens. I've been ridiculed over the phone because of it. That does not make me a happy camper. That increases my stress, which gives me migraines. (See 5)

Of course, at the moment I have no teeth. I will be getting dentures, but even then I may not be able to speak as clearly as I used to. All the more reason not to talk.

2. I am Not a Team Player

Actually, that's not exactly true. I can get along with people. But I prefer to work alone. I am not, however, the type to make small talk. I'm not overly friendly, I am not going to ask how your children are or ooh and ahh at their pictures. Let me do my work and I'll be as happy as a clam.

And the Number One Reason Why I Should Not Work Customer Service:

1. I'm Too Good!

Seriously, if it were not for the migraines I'd be content with the job. That's one of the weak points of my personality type, and why I've been content to look for jobs in this market for this long. Despite the fact that most employers are looking for young, enthusiastic reps, I still perform well overall, because I am consistent, I am calm over the phone and I can take a beating and still say 'Thank you for calling!'

As such, since I'm really getting nowhere in customer service and in fact, I get sicker with every new job, if SSDI decides I do not qualify for benefits because I can still do the same work I could before, I shall present them with this article, along with proof of my migraines.

I will no longer apply for customer service positions.

But that doesn't mean that I am incapable of working. so let's explore:

The Top 5 Reasons Why You Should Hire Me

 as long as it's not for customer service. ;-)

5. I Work Hard.

Give me a task, and watch me do it. Or better yet, leave me to the task and it will be done even faster. I am capable of great feats of concentration, even multi-tasking. I regularly sit at a computer for hours without taking a break, as long as the task is interesting and I have the skills. And oh boy...

4. I Have Skills.

If we limit the scope of my skills or potential skills to just computers, I could literally do anything at all computer-related. But my skills go far beyond that. I have writing skills. Wanna see a few samples? Well read the rest of this blog. Read my books at Amazon.com. Read my screenplays. Don't know where to find them? Ask! 

A lot of companies make a big deal out of personality tests these days. I took one a few days ago and promptly was rejected. Something in the way I answered the questions didn't mesh with their expectations. So let's talk about personality. I am quiet. I don't talk much. I am creative. I see things a lot of people don't. I listen, observe and react in an appropriate fashion. I am honest, which is one reason why I didn't get that job, I suppose. I could lie, and choose the aspects you want me to have, but then I'd feel bad. I am intelligent, I'd like to think. I like to think! I like to imagine. I can put myself in other people's shoes.

I went to the NCworks.gov website. They allow you to post a resume, and you can add a description of your work, that the site uses to see if you are a match for other jobs. My first time through, it said I didn't have the skills necessary to be a customer service agent. So I went through their list of skills and added everything that I could do. Now it says I match for skills, but not in personality. Not a big thing, I don't want to work customer service any more. But the fact is, adding those skills made me somewhat more marketable. 

Here's a list of what I put on it: Edited Wrote Authored Communicated Composed Revised Conceptualized Created Produced 

Reviewed Researched  Write,

Interviewed Articulated Referred Listened Reported Clarified Resolved Collaborated Responded 

Communicated Solicited 

Explained Spoke Observed Consulted Contacted Persuaded Influenced Convinced Promoted 

Corresponded Proposed Acted 

Customized Adapted Addressed Performed Solved Adjusted Administered Analyzed Corrected 

Reduced Assessed Researched 

Adapted Answered Counseled Guided Represented Arranged Demonstrated Helped Resolved 

Assessed Diagnosed Assisted 

Educated Cared.

I like that last one, Cared. I do care.

3. I Have Talent.

A lot of people confuse skills and talent. Let me define them as I see them. Skills are the ability to do a specific task. A skill is learned through experience. Talent is the ability to move past skills to a 'higher plane' of work. In my case, my talents include creative writing. Being creative is something you are born with. Skills can be learned, and honed, but  being creative is something you have or haven't. No amount of training will make you creative.

2. I Live Outside the Box.

A lot of people say 'think outside the box.' I live there. It goes along with talent. My thought process puts me on different planets, within the bodies of aliens, male and female, in different situations, finding solutions to made up problems. I've lived lives over and over again, born, lived, died, moved on to another life and start the process over and over again, just in the last week. Think how I could positively affect a company that is tired of the same old, same old.

1. I'm the Protagonist. I Want to Make a Difference.

The simple fact is, I'm tired, mentally and physically, of spinning my wheels doing jobs that are under-appreciated. I want to make a difference in the lives of everyone I touch, and that is one reason why I write, that and my brain won't let me stop. It took me 36 years to start to tap my creativity, though my mind had been bugging me practically since birth, and write my first book. I haven't stopped ever since coming up with different plots and outcomes, and you know what? In every case the protagonist wants to make a difference in the world. That's me. I'm the protagonist. I want my ideas to have an impact on the world. That's why I share them here. That's what makes me valuable to any employer. I don't keep my ideas to myself. I'm not looking for wealth or power. Grant me the ability to use my creative mind in a comfortable surrounding, and I'll be happy with that, and my performance will prove it.

I didn't write this blog to blow up bridges or to keep employers from hiring me. I want to be honest about what you're getting if you do hire me.

Prisons and Shoulders and Knees, Oh My!

I shared this on Facebook earlier today, but I decided to make it into a blog because it's a rather important topic.

Last night a man came roaring into the dining hall, yelling that someone had stolen the Tupperware bowl he had under his bed. He then went on to complain that he had just gotten out of prison only to be treated like this, his language laced with swears and threats. 

Unfortunately this serves to highlight one of the bigger problems not just with homeless shelters but also with prisons. Ex-cons are not prepared before they leave prison to come back into the system, so they wind up at the shelter. I have no idea what the percentage of former inmates is, but I know that I'm one of the few without a prison record.

The problem is both with prisons and with shelters. Too many think that prisoners should be punished and leave it at that. I'm not soft on crime, but I do believe if you serve your time, you deserve something more than to be let out with no resources to get your life back on track. 

Instead, they are dumped back into the streets. What choice do most of them have but to return to the life of crime and drugs? Even if they work while in prison they are paid so little that they have no cash to fall back on. Employers don't generally hire felons (otherwise why ask?) and especially at the good jobs that pay well enough and are consistent enough to pay a living wage.

I'm not saying hire that sex offender for child care, or hire the man charged with assault with a deadly weapon as the greeter at Wal*Mart (don't get me started on them, please). But I am saying let's get these prisoners trained on a useful skill before they leave prison, and also let's get them jobs as they leave prison. Why continue to put the burden on the county and state to support them after they get out?

[Steps off soapbox, breaks arm in the process...]

Speaking of arms, I've been seeing my physical therapist for a few weeks now. I'm making progress, but I still need to build strength in the shoulder and arm. There are a number of tender spots on the shoulder, and we're working on getting them 'awoken' except for one spot, which my therapist tells me is bone. I see my doctor in a week and a half and I hope to get some X-Rays taken of the arm to make sure there are no additional problems with the bone that was broken in the accident.

I'm worried, though, because it's been 9 months since the accident and if it were going to heal, it should have happened before now. I'm worried that I will need surgery and no one will be willing to pay for it, because I sure as hell can't. I also can't feel that I'm fully healed until that pain in the shoulder stops. If there is a problem and I can't get it fixed, I will be applying for a disability. I've tried to avoid it before, because I felt the shoulder was a temporary disability. I may be wrong about that, though.

My knee has good moments and not-so-good moments. Sometimes I walk normally, a slight limp, and sometimes I have to stop and sit. There have been a number of times when I've felt the knee and it seemed like the bottom part of the leg, the drumstick if you will, is protruding slightly from where it meets the knee, especially compared to the other knee. That worries the hell out of me, but I know that without surgery, it will never fully heal. That, at least, I can overcome, as long as I don't have to walk very far and as long as I don't have to stand for long periods of time, so I don't really consider that a disability for the kind of work I want to do.

Yet, I am not entirely able to the kind of work everyone wants me to do, which is "Anything." I'll have to talk to my doctor to see if I can get something in writing to that effect.

That is all, as always thanks for reading!

My Skillset, Part Deux

Yes, you saw a little bit of my French background. Also enjoyed "Hot Shots: Part Deux" as well!

So we left off in the last blog with me working for Radio Shack as a SALES rep, and me acquainting myself with the Tandy line of computers. This was in 1990 or so, and Tandy was making 80386 and 80486 computers (The predecessors to Pentium processors). They used MS-DOS and something relatively new to the market, something called "Windows." I spent my free time playing with those computers and learning the ins and outs of Windows.

The PC fascinated me and soon I had a hankering for more information. I learned how to BUILD my own x86 system, INSTALL DOS and Windows, and other programs as well. I also learned how to DIAGNOSE problems with my own systems.

Radio Shack went by the wayside and I moved on to a Baby Bell, US West. I started there working PHONES in OUTBOUND SALES of telephone services. I found that line of work challenging, but I also had issues with one of the employees insisting on wearing perfume, which I am highly allergic to. I had my first migraines during this time. I moved from that department to a DATA ENTRY department, which also incurred a transfer to another city.

During this data entry point in my life I was content to enter the data. I was fast and competent. Some part of me liked the lack of challenge, because I could let my mind wander, and soon a story started to form in my head and dreams, and for the first time, I began to WRITE, on an old-style typewriter, no less. Reams of pages and rewrites later, I entered the data on an actual computer, and started to get some feedback from other writers. I also taught myself HTML and JAVASCRIPT to create a web site that highlighted that writing.

Also during this time I began taking classes at the University of Nebraska at Omaha. I wanted a change in my life, and the story I was writing seemed to be something that would fit well on television. UNO had no 'television' courses per se, but they did have a Broadcast Journalism program. I took classes in writing for newspapers, and classes on writing for news. I took classes on how to produce a news show and that was really what I wanted out of it, to get behind the camera.

The job with US West moved along well enough for me to get a promotion. I took a six week training program on how to PROGRAM their computers in COBOL, MVS and JES3. I'd like to say I was challenged by the training and the job itself, but my previous education (though not complete) allowed me to breeze through the training and land squarely on my feet.

Unfortunately, I landed on my feet, but also stepped on the toes of the existing staff. The work I was required to do was tedious, since it was updating existing programs to prepare for Y2K. I had to add lines of code for every reference to a date. It was a stop-gap fix at best, since the 'real' work of creating new programs that did not rely on COBOL was left to others.

I have to say, that in all the lines of code that I corrected, I made one mistake. But it was a doozy! I left out the conversion code on one important segment of code. People were getting high bills and it was all my fault. It left our team scrambling to make changes and to make corrections. I really felt down about that.

But I tried to make amends. I updated the DOCUMENTATION of each program we were responsible for and printed out fresh copies of code. Reams of code. But it wasn't enough, and soon I was let go.

But I had a backup! I was now trained in  broadcast journalism. I took a part time job as a PRODUCTION ASSISTANT for a local station. But I had to leave UNO before I graduated because of the lack of money.

As a production assistant, I had many duties, such as CAMERA OPERATION during live news casts; CHYRON operation, which for those that don't know, is the graphics you see at the bottom and on the side of the newscaster; AUDIO OPERATOR, which means when the newscaster talks, I opened his or her microphone.

Last and not least, I edited footage from news feeds for the 'voice over' part of the newscast.

In the end, I liked the job better than most jobs. I liked it to the point where I wanted to direct newscasts. That was a bit of mistake for me because I was offered two jobs almost simultaneously. One was a 30 hour a week job at a station managed by one of my instructors, who was doing me a tremendous favor. It was  a video editor job. The other was as an ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR at a station in Lynchburg, VA. It was full-time, and obviously had more clout to it.

I made the decision to go to Lynchburg. I should have stayed in Omaha, but hindsight is always 20-20.

The Lynchburg job started okay. The problem was that I was the new guy and a bit of a yankee in the middle of a bunch of southerners who were set in their ways. I tried my best to fit in. They trained me in all their stations, the same ones I already had experience on at the other station. But the director who hired me apparently didn't want to give up the secrets of his position very quickly. I had to learned the director's board on my own time, usually between newscasts.

After doing a little training on the board for six months, I went to the boss, and asked him for more training. He moved me to the morning show, and then began a crash course (literally) on directing. Because I had little experience with live directing before then, I felt a bit overwhelmed by the pace I was subjected to.

I was thrown in as a live director before I was ready, and made a number of small errors. But I was improving show after show. Then one day I made a big mistake in front of a producer who completely freaked out, and the next thing I know, I'm gone.

Anyone in the news field knows that mistakes happen, especially with new directors. I don't feel that I was given a chance on that job.

But that led to another career choice, the one I'm most experienced with at the moment: CUSTOMER SERVICE.

It started with a company that provided customer service for a number of religious organizations, doing things like TAKING ORDERS over the phone, updating customer information, and generally being pleasant over the phone. I can do pleasant.

During that job I was promoted to what they called BUSINESS ANALYST, which in this case meant that I monitored call flow and called for people to get on the phones when needed.

After that I took a job as a TECHNICAL SUPPORT agent for Echostar, where I figured out why people's satellite service wasn't working and dispatched technicians when needed. For a time during my stay with Echostar I was also a SATELLITE INSTALLER, but I didn't have the stamina to do the job correctly and I also had a fear of heights. I went back to being a TSR.

While at Echostar I saw a need for certain services, and I attempted to go into business for myself as a TRAINER in how to install and diagnose satellite systems for the everyday user. Unfortunately, that business was underfunded and failed.

But I moved on and found more customer service work in Raleigh, NC. I worked for a company that provided customer service for a variety of accounts. I used ONLINE CHATS, EMAILS and phones to help the customers. I even had a stint as a MENTOR to one group, which meant I took supervisor calls.

Later, I worked from home as a SMARTPHONE TECH, diagnosing issues with BLACKBERRIES and PALM devices. That ended when I lost my home.

But I rebounded and landed a job as an APPLE ADVISOR, which meant I got to learn all about iMACS, MACBOOKS, and OS X 10.5, 10.6, and 10.7. I handled support calls for those machines.

Yet, despite all that experience, I've always known I'm a writer. I wrote three PUBLISHED BOOKS, SCRIPTS based on some of those books, and even looked into forming my own VIDEO PRODUCTION company to produce those scripts.

But though right now I am unemployed, I have not lost hope, and I still have dreams that I want to come true. In April of this year I formed Mike's News Hangout, where I used skills in VIDEOGRAPHY, EDITING, WEB SITE DESIGN. I spent two months on the road recording video and I have a youtube page with my videos.

My computer skills haven't diminished, but I am primarily self-taught on all things Windows, HTML and Javascript. Though I don't have the funds to get certified, I am confident I could get A+ certified in a number of areas.

I read a lot on the Internet. I watch how other people do things and I try to emulate them. I learn fast and work as fast as I can even when others tell me to take it slower. I am eager to impress, and I just need a chance.

Same Old, Same Old

I've been in happy ruts before, working, playing, getting paid, even paying bills - slowly, but right now I'm in a jobless, homeless, no money, not much fun rut and...

I HATE IT!

The worst part is, I'm trying to apply for the kind of jobs I know I can do, and I'm still not hearing from anyone. What, am I on some kind of national blacklist? Have hiring managers been looking at my Youtube Page and going "No, never in a million years?"

Well, if that's happening, I'm sorry, I'm not going to take it down. If you won't hire me because of that, I don't want to work for you.

But I do want to work! If you can't guess my skillset from my WRITING and VIDEOS, let me tell you something about my skills:

I started out in college at Florida State University as a French Major. Yes, for a time, I spoke pretty fluent French and could write well also.

But times changed and so did my major, to Computer Science. I learned advanced mathematics, computer architecture, and PROGRAMMING in a mainframe environment (Control Data Assembly, PASCAL and COBOL, with a little FORTRAN mixed in.) I even had some experience during that time in what amounted to volunteer work (or "contract if you ask the owner") at a small company that used a minicomputer to handle data entry for a small insurance company. I programmed in SYBOL and handled day to day routines.

Broke and fed up with empty promises, I moved on from both Florida State and that company and moved to Tampa, where I did CLERICAL work for another insurance company.

Then I started taking a course in ELECTRONICS at a small 'college' in Tampa and eventually earned a 'diploma' there. I moved to Las Vegas and worked with repairing slot machines and video poker machines.

After Las Vegas I wandered for a bit, taking odd jobs, but landed a temporary job as a COMPUTER OPERATOR, working tape drives, running BATCH jobs with MVS/JES2.

Then I turned to sales at RADIO SHACK. I sold small parts, all kinds of electronics and I started learning about PC's and DOS, and the relatively new WINDOWS 3.0.

Seeing a trend here? I hope so. Tomorrow I'll continue after Radio Shack and tell you what else I can do.

Thanks for reading.