Prisons and Shoulders and Knees, Oh My!

I shared this on Facebook earlier today, but I decided to make it into a blog because it's a rather important topic.

Last night a man came roaring into the dining hall, yelling that someone had stolen the Tupperware bowl he had under his bed. He then went on to complain that he had just gotten out of prison only to be treated like this, his language laced with swears and threats. 

Unfortunately this serves to highlight one of the bigger problems not just with homeless shelters but also with prisons. Ex-cons are not prepared before they leave prison to come back into the system, so they wind up at the shelter. I have no idea what the percentage of former inmates is, but I know that I'm one of the few without a prison record.

The problem is both with prisons and with shelters. Too many think that prisoners should be punished and leave it at that. I'm not soft on crime, but I do believe if you serve your time, you deserve something more than to be let out with no resources to get your life back on track. 

Instead, they are dumped back into the streets. What choice do most of them have but to return to the life of crime and drugs? Even if they work while in prison they are paid so little that they have no cash to fall back on. Employers don't generally hire felons (otherwise why ask?) and especially at the good jobs that pay well enough and are consistent enough to pay a living wage.

I'm not saying hire that sex offender for child care, or hire the man charged with assault with a deadly weapon as the greeter at Wal*Mart (don't get me started on them, please). But I am saying let's get these prisoners trained on a useful skill before they leave prison, and also let's get them jobs as they leave prison. Why continue to put the burden on the county and state to support them after they get out?

[Steps off soapbox, breaks arm in the process...]

Speaking of arms, I've been seeing my physical therapist for a few weeks now. I'm making progress, but I still need to build strength in the shoulder and arm. There are a number of tender spots on the shoulder, and we're working on getting them 'awoken' except for one spot, which my therapist tells me is bone. I see my doctor in a week and a half and I hope to get some X-Rays taken of the arm to make sure there are no additional problems with the bone that was broken in the accident.

I'm worried, though, because it's been 9 months since the accident and if it were going to heal, it should have happened before now. I'm worried that I will need surgery and no one will be willing to pay for it, because I sure as hell can't. I also can't feel that I'm fully healed until that pain in the shoulder stops. If there is a problem and I can't get it fixed, I will be applying for a disability. I've tried to avoid it before, because I felt the shoulder was a temporary disability. I may be wrong about that, though.

My knee has good moments and not-so-good moments. Sometimes I walk normally, a slight limp, and sometimes I have to stop and sit. There have been a number of times when I've felt the knee and it seemed like the bottom part of the leg, the drumstick if you will, is protruding slightly from where it meets the knee, especially compared to the other knee. That worries the hell out of me, but I know that without surgery, it will never fully heal. That, at least, I can overcome, as long as I don't have to walk very far and as long as I don't have to stand for long periods of time, so I don't really consider that a disability for the kind of work I want to do.

Yet, I am not entirely able to the kind of work everyone wants me to do, which is "Anything." I'll have to talk to my doctor to see if I can get something in writing to that effect.

That is all, as always thanks for reading!

Addiction, and how to treat it

I'm no stranger to addiction. A few years back I had a number of episodes where I gambled away everything I had on the slots and poker machines of Las Vegas. And this while I worked for the company that serviced those machines.

Even now, if you put me in a casino and put money in my hands, that money will soon be gone.

I beat that addiction, if you can put it that way, by simply not going to casinos anymore.

In my time as a homeless person, I've seen many people who shows signs of addiction: Alcohol, Crack, Cocaine, Marijuana, and yes, Gambling.

I've sat through a few of the 12-Step programs, forced to, really, by the kind folks at the Salvation Army shelter in Roanoke, VA. I have serious issues with that type of program, and I have some suggestions on different ways to handle addiction, which works in well with what I want to do with Project Five-Star. Yes, I still want that to work, somehow.

The problems I have with 12-Step programs are:

1) They don't work for everyone. I don't necessarily believe in a higher power and that's one of the central points of the program.

2) You are in danger of falling back into your addiction if you stop going to meetings. This is because the program does not handle the reason for the addiction in the first place. Personally I think this is why so many drop out of it, only to return at a later time.

3) They don't address the reason for the addiction. (I know, I said that before, it's rather important.)

4) It assumes you're addicted for life, something I don't necessarily believe in.

So, with those issues addressed, let me talk about what I'd like to see in an addiction recovery program:

1) A sit-down with a psychiatrist to get to the root of the problem. In my case, lack of money has always been my issue, so I had a desire, fed by the endorphins that the pretty lights and sounds of winning caused in my brain, to get the 'big win' so I would have more money. The problem is, I didn't know when to stop. I didn't need a psychiatrist to tell me this. Other people might need a little help to discover the root of their addictions and address those issues.

2) Once you have those underlying problems cornered, you learn to deal with them. This is a highly personal adventure yet the addicted need to be guided through the process. But rather than make you sit through meetings where the same topics are covered ad nauseum (think the 'losing is an illness' scene from 'The Natural,') let's redirect the energy spent on an addiction and thinking about an addiction to something more positive.

3) Redirect the energy to a hobby that you enjoy. Maybe even more than one hobby in case the hobbies you choose are easily finished, boring or otherwise unsatisfying. Find a hobby you can enjoy, a skill you're good at that makes those endorphins flow in a productive manner.

When you think about it, all 12-Step meetings are simply a redirection of energy, but it only lasts as long as the meeting.

In my case, writing has redirected much of the energy I might have spent gambling. Also playing video games, though some might consider that to be unproductive. It's a hobby I enjoy, and the endorphins flow just fine without me spending more than $15/month. As far as writing being productive, well some might argue that in my case it hasn't been as productive as it might be. I say I have 3 books published. How many do you have? I have 168 posts in this blog and a few more in other blogs. I say I have at least two movie scripts at various stages of development, one TV series, and thousands of ideas flowing through my head, which have ultimately thrown any ideas of gambling out of my head. So this idea has worked for me.

That's the gist of what I hope to put together for Project Five-Star. I'm no expert, I don't claim to know everything. Falling off the wagon is likely to occur whichever method you choose. It's just an idea. You can take it and run, or leave it and go back to your AA meeting.

As always, thanks for reading!

Living Will

In my medical front office class, we've been discussing ethics and other juicy tidbits. One of the things that came up was a Living Will.

I've already let my daughter know my wishes, but just to clarify matters here's my version of a living will:

I, Michael Harrison Fox, being of sound mind and body (at the moment), do hereby set forth my wishes for all to see on this 10th day of November, 2012.

1. If I am incapacitated in any way, I expect doctors to take every action necessary to save my life. I don't care if I don't have insurance, and have no money. I'm fighting for every moment of life I can have.

2. If the above actions don't have a happy result, and I die, I want to be cremated and dump my ashes in the nearest trash can. You may have a memorial if you like where you can badmouth me, I won't care. I won't be looking down at you. I fully expect my soul to have found a new body way before then.

3. If I have any belongings or assets that aren't taken by my creditors, they can go to my daughter. She knows who she is. And to the creditors who will stand in line: My mother was fond of an old saying: "You can't get blood from a turnip." And I might add: "You don't get warm blood from a dead body."

4. If I have any other heirs, first, I'll be shocked. Let's face it, I'll be dead, so, no I won't be shocked. Second, I doubt there will be much to go around. I've never been good at managing money. Sorry.

5. I am a registered organ donor. If I die, you may take any organs that aren't already diseased or rotted away and put them into bodies of those that need them. Just, please, be sure I'm dead before you do it. I'd hate to wake up and find my liver missing. Not that I'd wake up from something like that.

6. When I die, I leave my writing to the world. If any money is made from it, it goes to my daughter. My only question is: Why did you wait until I'm dead to enjoy it?

That is all. I hope it will be 40 years before this goes into effect, but then, I don't get my way very much any more. I'll fight to the end, though!

Finally, Election 2012 is over - mostly

A few meanderings about the election:

I dunno, I feel like the election may have been called a bit early. CBS based their info on 'exit poll data,' which to me is stupid, because I voted, and was ever asked who I voted for.

Not that I'm disputing the result, my guy won, after all, but I felt more time was required.

Two states voted to legalize marijuana. I have very negative feelings about that. I'm allergic to smoke in general, or at least hypersensitive about it, so if I had my way, both mary jane and cigarettes would be illegal, but I rarely get my way.

Moore Square, where the buses congregate to breed, is filled to the brim with smokers, and yes, the smell of marijuana. It's also filled with cops, and you'd think they'd enforce the law when it comes to pot, but they don't. And what this basically means is they've already declared pot legal.

Alcohol is at least as dangerous as pot, yet it's legal. Yet when I see someone who is drunk and smell it on their breath (a frequent occurrence), I'm not in danger of getting drunk myself. On the other hand, when someone smokes marijuana nearby, I stand the risk of inhaling that crap and failing a drug test.

Even if pot were legalized, I'd still fail that drug test, because you can't be in the program under the influence of alcohol or drugs.

So while part of me is resigned to think that pot should be legalized, but only because it's not enforced anywhere, the other, larger part of me is warning that no good can come from it.

(Steps off soap box)

It bothers me that while Obama won, the Republicans retained control of the House. Isn't that what led to the stalemate we've had over the last 2 years?

I'm happy that the jerks who let show their true feelings about rape and women were not re-elected. Shows we have some common sense after all. Some.

So I wish President Obama the best of luck in the next 4 years. Oh, and can I have a job? ;-)

Go Vote

Some would say it doesn't matter who you vote for, as long as you vote. I say it's important to vote for the candidates that best reflect your own positions.
There is no such thing as a perfect candidate. They all have flaws. Some lean too far left, some too far right. I've always been squarely in the middle. My own views and needs rarely get served. Even so, there is only one candidate that will help the homeless and poor like me, so my decision this year was easy.

I voted early for Barak Obama.

You may vote for whomever you wish.

That is all.

5,000 Views and Counting

This site just passed its 5,000th view. I want to thank those that took the time to read my rants. I'm hoping for a lot more views in the future!

A few meanderings:

On "Superstorm Sandy": My heart goes out to those affected by the storm. Here in Raleigh we experienced rain and wind, but not as much as other areas. I'd like to comment to those who blame this storm on global warming, or God's Retribution: First, this was only a category 1 hurricane. It happened to hit land in the most densely populated area that it could, and that is what caused the damage. Second, this was an act of nature. It wasn't nearly as intense as it could have been. If the storm had come ashore in the Carolinas, it would have fizzled before hitting anywhere else. Let's clean up and move on.

I will be starting a new class at Wake Tech on Monday that will cover working at the front desk in the medical field. It's a free course to me. I'll learn about medical billing etc. It should be fun!

I'm still hoping Mike's News Hangout will get funding. After all, if no one else will hire me, I know I will! Current totals from AdSense are $45.40. And growing.

That is all!

...The Worst They Can Do Is Say No.

My work experience the last 12 years has leaned toward customer service and technical support. So my job search had been centered around those skills. The problem with that is the companies that hire for this skill are ones that I've already applied to or have worked for and won't get hired back to.

I have other skills, of course. Writing comes to mind. So I've expanded my job search to include writing, proofreading, editing and the like. I've even reached into Technical Writing, even though I haven't done that - much. I did a little bit of documenting while working for US West, but since they don't exist any more (eaten by Qwest, and God knows who else), I don't have any real references for it. I'm tempted to take a manual I find online, poorly written, and make into a fine example of Technical Writing, just so I can prove I have the skills. Maybe I'll even post it on this blog. Rants and Ravings of a Technical Writer. :-)

But I'd be worried about copyright infringement, not that I'm worried about getting sued. I'm so far in debt just for medical expenses that one more lawsuit won't hurt my credit. But from the perspective of a writer, it would bother me. Would I want someone else taking my work and correcting errors in it? No, I would not. Because everything I've ever written since time began is perfect. ;-)

Today I applied for a Technical Writer job at Red Hat. It was the only position in the Raleigh area I was even remotely qualified for. And, as the title goes, the worst they can do is say no. Many companies have said no so far.

Still, I'm offering my services on a web site called fiverr.com, where anyone can offer a service as long as the price is $5. Anything to make a buck at this point.

Last year, I tried to work with a company called Odesk, which is a third party site that brings together people looking for work and people looking for work to be done. The problem with that site is you have to bid for the services. It's an international company, so you have people from all over the world bidding on the same projects you do. Things like customer service, technical support, etc. The problem comes when you try to bid a livable wage. You get undercut by someone who is offering to do the job for half or even less than half of what you might consider a livable wage.

Say you wanted a customer service position, working from home, and you were willing to work 40 hours for $7/hour. Here, that's below minimum wage, but in places like India, that's top notch pay. And that's the competition I'm facing there. I saw bids as low as a dollar an hour. And I'm tempted to try that, just to get a reputation, but somehow I don't think I'd get very far in the long run if I had to keep that up.

So life goes on.

Sandy is still in my area, sort of. We're getting wind and rain, but nothing like they are further north. By tomorrow it will have moved north of where I am and we'll have blue skies again. I hope everyone in the affected area stays safe.

That is all!