Saturday, November 10, 2012

Living Will

In my medical front office class, we've been discussing ethics and other juicy tidbits. One of the things that came up was a Living Will.

I've already let my daughter know my wishes, but just to clarify matters here's my version of a living will:

I, Michael Harrison Fox, being of sound mind and body (at the moment), do hereby set forth my wishes for all to see on this 10th day of November, 2012.

1. If I am incapacitated in any way, I expect doctors to take every action necessary to save my life. I don't care if I don't have insurance, and have no money. I'm fighting for every moment of life I can have.

2. If the above actions don't have a happy result, and I die, I want to be cremated and dump my ashes in the nearest trash can. You may have a memorial if you like where you can badmouth me, I won't care. I won't be looking down at you. I fully expect my soul to have found a new body way before then.

3. If I have any belongings or assets that aren't taken by my creditors, they can go to my daughter. She knows who she is. And to the creditors who will stand in line: My mother was fond of an old saying: "You can't get blood from a turnip." And I might add: "You don't get warm blood from a dead body."

4. If I have any other heirs, first, I'll be shocked. Let's face it, I'll be dead, so, no I won't be shocked. Second, I doubt there will be much to go around. I've never been good at managing money. Sorry.

5. I am a registered organ donor. If I die, you may take any organs that aren't already diseased or rotted away and put them into bodies of those that need them. Just, please, be sure I'm dead before you do it. I'd hate to wake up and find my liver missing. Not that I'd wake up from something like that.

6. When I die, I leave my writing to the world. If any money is made from it, it goes to my daughter. My only question is: Why did you wait until I'm dead to enjoy it?

That is all. I hope it will be 40 years before this goes into effect, but then, I don't get my way very much any more. I'll fight to the end, though!